Last night, my four-year old was helping me tidy the kitchen. He was telling me about all the healthy food he's going to make for me, "when he's a man." He said, "You can come over everyday to eat my healthy food, and be the babysitter for my kids." Then he looked up at me with his big, round, eyes and said, "And Mommy? If the kids are being wild, just text me." #funnykidquotes #growinguptoofast #parenting #stuffkidssay #reading #funnymom

My 2-year old came in singing a song from the episode of Teen TItans, Go! he just watched: "I'm a boy, a really cool boy. I'm a boy, a really cool boy." I started singing along, but he stopped me and said, "Don't sing that. You not the really cool boy." "So, who am I?" I asked him. He paused and thought about htis for a moment before saying, "You the Batman." #batman #boymom #teentitansgo #superhero #supermom #parenting #funnykidquotes #stuffkidssay

Everyone was enjoying the pound cake I made for the New Year, and my sister said, "You put your foot in this cake!" Later I noticed that my four-year old wasn't finishing his slice. I asked him why and he said, "I don't want it because you put your feet in it." We laughed and tried to explain to him it was only an expression, but he wasn't have any of it. That evening he came to me and rested his head on my shoulder. He said, "Mommy, will you please make another cake tomor

4 year-old: "Mmmm...the pizza smells so good! My nose is eating the smell. I can't wait to get my tasty lips on it!" So, now I know who to call next time I have writer's block, or I'm finding it difficult to describe a scene using the senses. #nanowrimo #nano2015 #pizza #amwriting #amediting #parenting #writersblock #stuffkidssay #tgif

The other night before bed, my four-year old said, "Mommy, me and Taylor 'Swilft' broke up." Me: "Oh really? Why?" Him: "Because, because a girl in my class said she is my girlfriend now." Me: "What is her name?" Him: (In annoyed exasperation) "I don't know she's name!" In addition to teaching him about the birds and the bees, it seems a grammar lesson is in order. And so ends the cutest (and longest!) episode of puppy love I've witnessed thus far. The first of many, I imag

Today my 2-year old started burping his words and responses during conversation. That seems young to acheive this mileston--I believe his brothers were at least three or four when they began to exhibit this ability. So the question is, is he a baby genius? *Note: I'm obviously just joking. I knew he was a baby genius when he started telling fart jokes six months ago. #stuffkidssay #boymom

Apparently we unknowningly participated in some Mystery Flavor Challenge, by way of purchasing a bag of Dum Dums with three new flavors: Buttered Popcorn, Bacon and Pizza. Because I assume they would appreciate feedback from four of their biggest fans, I am posting the results of the world’s cutest focus group. Results are as follows: Buttered Popcorn (yellow): “It tastes…kinda not good.” Bacon (brown): “It tastes baconey? Oh, and bad.” Pizza (red): The only one who will ea

"Ok, yes--great idea. When you become men you can come back and shop the clearance section at Walmart. But for now, get in the car!" - Me, standing in the Walmart parking lot in 100 degree weather #stuffkidssay #parenting #walmart