I love my house. It isn’t perfect, but yet it is perfect for our family. It is a great investment, has “good bones” if you will, and although we have our list of to dos, it is a wonderful home for our family. I have been working a lot lately, and I’ve started to see dust collecting in the corners, the cabinetry smudged with too many fingerprints, and noticed the bottom of the boys’ feet are dirty at the end of the day. For the first time I find myself contemplating hiring

Motherhood. It is a society of women so strong, so fierce, they are in actuality superheroes in spit-up and ketchup-stained disguises. Before becoming a mother, I never realized how much I could have benefited from martial arts training. Now that I’ve been a mother for a handful of years—I don’t need it. I’ve somehow become quite advanced in some pretty sweet ninja-like moves. For example? I can silently sneak into a room full of sleeping children to extract the one cryi

I know you’ve had a long day in the office today. It was a long, stressful end to an even longer stressful week. I’m sure you are anxious to get home, kick your feet up on the couch, and begin a quiet weekend full of rest. Which is why I regretfully must ask you to please avert your eyes from the large pile of unclean dishes on the counter. I know it will be the first thing that greets you as you walk into the kitchen, and yet I ask you to look away. I beg you instead to

I’ve been ignoring the laundry lately, leaving it to grow into a huge laundry-monster that I’ve been secretly hoping would catch (or at least scare) my children. But after a few days of just covering my bedroom floor, I realized that it will not discipline my kids, and therefore must be folded. So, as I was folding late at night, I happened to be watching Kung Fu Panda (go figure, because my four-year old was up with me) and I got to see the finest selection of As Seen on TV

Four or five years ago my kids discovered Yo Gabba Gabba. And thus began my love/hate relationship with the show that at the time I described as a “’shroom-like psychedelic trip for toddlers.” The first time I saw it we caught the tail end, where they do a remix of sorts with all of the songs from the episode against a backdrop of wildly-animated patterns and images of children performing sporadic dance moves. I remember thinking it must be one of those shows made to engag

Mastered it. #parenting #sahm #discipline

We're out at dinner and my four-year-old is under the table. He was quiet, so I didn't disturb him. Finally, he appears with a closed fist yelling, "Look! Someone left all this gum under here!" #parenting #sahm

I'm doing some consulting work and I needed to make an important call, but all four kids were home and I didn't want screaming in the background. I was talking to my husband about this on the phone, and he started making all of these suggestions. "Give them a cookie before you call," he says. "No, because it will only take them one second to eat the cookie and it will guarantee they will bother me to demand more." "Give them lots of cookies." No response necessary. "Put them

Every time I see this, it makes me laugh. And you don't have to work in an office to enjoy it--coincidently, this is how I exit the house on the rare occassion that I leave my kids at home. #sahm #tgif

Sometimes, instead of washing the sinkfull of dishes, I just stack the dirty dishes into like piles and go to bed praising myself for my superior organization skills. The bad news: the next day, if we are running late for school, I have to serve the kids' cereal on paper plates and plastic sporks from KFC and tell them it's Backwards Day. The good news: my kids watch Spongebob and have been introduced to the concept of Backwards Day, making it a plausible and exciting explana

I've made some extreme threats as to what I will do if anyone else fake-cries in this house again, and I know that in order to properly discipline my children, I must be consistent in following through. You have been warned. #parenting #discipline #sahm

I was going through my crazy quotes list, and I noticed that the group headings are sometimes as funny (and as random) as the actual quotes. For example, I have quotes under the headings of food, discipline, licking, safety, gross, and of course, poop (which, yes, is separate from gross). Every now and then, quotes in the miscellaneous group can be pulled out to form their own group. So today, I share with you the newest and most random group on my list: Ninjas. “I’m a mo

My Kindergartener brought home is first book from the school library today. I couldn't wait to see what he would choose. This is what he chose. #sahm

The second ever recorded 4-boy nap in all of history, and they wasted it at Walmart. Oh well, at least I got to shop in peace. #shopping #sahm

That’s right, the often dreamed about, but never quite achieved four boy nap. And all I had to do was take them out to the pool for two and a half hours, put on Frozen, and wait for it… I’d pat myself on the back, but the sound might wake them up. So here’s a question—what do you do with free time? Do I sleep? Read? Stare at the wall until my cheeks hurt from smiling so hard? I don’t think this has ever happened before… Any suggestions? #sahm

Here you go, photo proof that I can not turn my head for even one minute. This was a brand new pack of wipes. True story, after taking this picture, another child called me to some other room in the house and I forgot to move the wipes, again. So when I returned, the pile of wipes on the outside of the package was even larger. This will continue to annoy me every time I go to wipe a butt and have to wrestle the wadded-up wipes back out from this mangled package. *Let the e

Having these four animals children caged up in the house for the summer has tested the limits of brotherhood. The four little pillars of brotherly love I used to know have been replaced by temperamental, moody dudes with short fuses. We start the morning and they fight over who gets which cereal. Even when there is enough for everyone. Then they fight over the bowls. Even though I went out and bought four of the exact same bowls. Then, there is a debate over who has more

Today. It was just one of those. First, we leave the first store because the four year old is acting a fool. After a stern talk in the car, we barely make it through the second store because the three year old is a mess. Then, we get the slowest moving line in history (not kidding, it was so slow I had to fight back tears), then, one of the bags explodes and produce falls everywhere. This woman, looks around my age, carefully and politely steps over my onions to walk on b

My three year old just said, “Look, Mommy, it’s me and you!” #sahm

My husband is in favor of me staying home with the boys. He knows I would like to go back to work, but he really wants me to focus on the positives of staying home while I have the chance. Of course, he is right, and I am truly grateful for having the opportunity, even though I personally find that for me staying home is much more difficult than working. He is always trying to give me helpful advice on how to keep pushing forward, although sometimes I find he is a little o